Many a tangent today for this blog post. So brace yourself.
Two weeks ago was Halloween, which just so happens to be my least favorite holiday. Mainly due to finding the costume, having to dress up, putting forth effort, etc. HOWEVER! This year my friend Jake gave me a beautiful idea of dressing as one of my idols and he would dress as one of her many boy toys. That’s right! T-Swift came out in full force for my costume. We chose Blank Space and the portion of the video where Taylor goes crazy and cuts her current beau’s shirt. So…I had mascara smeared down my face and he had a shirt with holes in it. Absolute beautiful mess. Halloween this year almost changed my dislike for it…almost.
On to the next tangent.
Having a bad case of the Millennial Mind.
In my humble opinion, this takes on many different meanings the most prominent currently being not being able to sit and read.
If I am just sitting and reading a book, I believe that I am missing something important that I should be doing. I apparently have no qualms about laying in bed and watching hours of YouTube videos or Netflix. However, the moment I crack a book open a flood of anxiety washes over me. I love reading. Reading has helped me focus my overly imaginative brain into pictures and people who come alive right out of the page. The moment I stepped foot into freshman year of college reading was shoved to the side for homework. I began to miss reading though, because it is honestly one of my favorite past times. So every so often I would binge read a book and finish it in a day or two. But that doesn’t go so well when I, also, have three homework assignments due and a test the next day. So solution number two was created. Read right before I go to sleep. Many people do this, you see it in movies all of the time.
This worked well for a solid two weeks, and then I kept getting to bed too late and just passing out from the day. No reading was done. So then I just gave up and read here and there, read a lot over breaks, if I found a book I liked I added it to my list contained in the post-it notes on my computer. Currently, in my junior year, I still haven’t found a good time to read due to my schedule fluctuating every other freaking second. I have started a book, The Opposite of Loneliness, and this is where I found the anxiety to just come at me. As previously stated, I have just breached on the world of YouTube and am obsessed. I can watch those videos for hours without feeling a thing, besides joy, due to watching the videos. I opened to the first page of my book and was immediately thinking about every other thing I could have been doing.
SOLUTION 3. Went to the gym. Got on an elliptical. And read.
And it worked! I didn’t feel any anxiety about just reading a book. My mind was like, yeah this is okay because you’re also working out.
Why is it okay in my mind for me to waste hours on YouTube and Netflix, and unacceptable to read a book.
Tangent on running out of yogurt.
This is just occurring due to me running out of yogurt and not being able to make a smoothie last night. A smoothie just sounds real delicious but I ate all my yogurt earlier yesterday.
Before writing this I had a lot more tangents…but I can’t remember them all. Really should write them down.
Ah well, c’est la vie.
Embrace the awkward and practice reckless optimism.